[ It's good to see them smiling again. Really, really smiling. Sypha's good at the kind of smiles that have gritted teeth behind them, and there have been a lot of those lately. The real kind is much preferable.
(Perhaps he could have died and not cared. Or turned and not cared. But he'd have always cared very much about not seeing those warm, stupid smiles again.)
There's not too much blood to wash off. A lot around his throat (and he manages not to flinch as the cloth catches against burned skin, because he can see the worry in Sypha's face as it does). A little around the arm. And that's it. That's it. No places where he's manages to claw himself, or tear at his hair hard enough to pull away pieces of scalp. No tears of blood. No deer blood or Alucard blood. There's so very little, less than after some bar fights, and it's about the closest anything can get to feeling amazing right now. ]
Like it never fucking happened.
[ Okay that's a bit much. He's still about half the size he was a week and a half ago. Still with that patch of grey skin. Still in pretty fucking horrible shape. All of them still exhausted physically and mentally and emotionally. But he's content to just pretend all of that isn't true, just to give the whole thing no power at all over them. They wrote Carmilla out of existence, no matter how deep the damage she left was. They can do the same with this. ]
no subject
(Perhaps he could have died and not cared. Or turned and not cared. But he'd have always cared very much about not seeing those warm, stupid smiles again.)
There's not too much blood to wash off. A lot around his throat (and he manages not to flinch as the cloth catches against burned skin, because he can see the worry in Sypha's face as it does). A little around the arm. And that's it. That's it. No places where he's manages to claw himself, or tear at his hair hard enough to pull away pieces of scalp. No tears of blood. No deer blood or Alucard blood. There's so very little, less than after some bar fights, and it's about the closest anything can get to feeling amazing right now. ]
Like it never fucking happened.
[ Okay that's a bit much. He's still about half the size he was a week and a half ago. Still with that patch of grey skin. Still in pretty fucking horrible shape. All of them still exhausted physically and mentally and emotionally. But he's content to just pretend all of that isn't true, just to give the whole thing no power at all over them. They wrote Carmilla out of existence, no matter how deep the damage she left was. They can do the same with this. ]