[He'd looked down and away from her, earlier; it's understandable why. He'd had to do this with Trevor, before her, and now he has to do it again, just more weight and more weight on top of everything else he's carrying.
(She's always noticed the weight of the burdens he carries. She always coddles him.)
She doesn't look away. She won't, because Speakers don't avert their eyes from tragedy. It's always their job to watch, when no one else will, because someone has to remember.]
Why didn't you just buy me a train ticket, Alucard? You don't want me at your fight. You already want me gone if something goes wrong. Why not just send me away now?
[Her voice cracks, but her will doesn't.]
You could just take it all back. The house. The car. My room and all the little drawers. The dresses. The toys. You could've just taken them. The money — just take it all back. One bag and a set of robes, that's all I came here with. Trevor's gun, now, too. You could make me leave. This isn't my home. I don't have a home, I never have. I didn't need one, because I had you.
[Her vision blurs; it's hard to see him anymore, but it doesn't matter. The sight of him is burned into her mind's eye and etched into her heart.]
Safe, happy, here. Trevor told me I get two. But I don't — I get one, and you've already picked it for me.
[Safe.]
This city has never been safe for Speakers.
[It wasn't back then. It isn't now.]
Why don't you just get rid of me, so that you can at least die knowing I'm safe?
no subject
[He'd looked down and away from her, earlier; it's understandable why. He'd had to do this with Trevor, before her, and now he has to do it again, just more weight and more weight on top of everything else he's carrying.
(She's always noticed the weight of the burdens he carries. She always coddles him.)
She doesn't look away. She won't, because Speakers don't avert their eyes from tragedy. It's always their job to watch, when no one else will, because someone has to remember.]
Why didn't you just buy me a train ticket, Alucard? You don't want me at your fight. You already want me gone if something goes wrong. Why not just send me away now?
[Her voice cracks, but her will doesn't.]
You could just take it all back. The house. The car. My room and all the little drawers. The dresses. The toys. You could've just taken them. The money — just take it all back. One bag and a set of robes, that's all I came here with. Trevor's gun, now, too. You could make me leave. This isn't my home. I don't have a home, I never have. I didn't need one, because I had you.
[Her vision blurs; it's hard to see him anymore, but it doesn't matter. The sight of him is burned into her mind's eye and etched into her heart.]
Safe, happy, here. Trevor told me I get two. But I don't — I get one, and you've already picked it for me.
[Safe.]
This city has never been safe for Speakers.
[It wasn't back then. It isn't now.]
Why don't you just get rid of me, so that you can at least die knowing I'm safe?