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She's a good girl. She'd have only wanted to be friends. But they probably wouldn't have cared for it anyway.
[ He waves to the hens. ]
Bye. We're going to buy some of your dead friends.
[ He waves to the hens. ]
Bye. We're going to buy some of your dead friends.
[They're both miserable and barely drunk. What a shitty way to be dealing with any of this. The Belmont looking up. Him looking down. A study in contrasts, aren't they?]
Mmm.
[That's all he can say. Because Trevor's right. They did their one good deed. They don't have to do anything else ever again. Yet they did, and why?
He brings his feet up onto the sofa, if only so he can rest his chin atop his knees. Stare at the fire.]
Yet here we are.
Mmm.
[That's all he can say. Because Trevor's right. They did their one good deed. They don't have to do anything else ever again. Yet they did, and why?
He brings his feet up onto the sofa, if only so he can rest his chin atop his knees. Stare at the fire.]
Yet here we are.
No, they wouldn't have.
[Trevor plz.
Alucard laughs a little though, then guides Trevor to their last spot. One of the meat vendors, rushed and overwhelmed. Alucard knows them and knows that now isn't the time to talk. He gets a full bird and some hind quarters, and that's that. Tasks Trevor with carrying the bag, and then?
Then they wind their way home. The streets have more people now. A few that know Alucard and say hello, but understand that he's coming home from shopping and needs to keep his forward momentum. He has a patient, proably.
He unlocks the door. Heads in and immediately starts unpacking the groceries.]
Thank you for your help with the bags.
[Trevor plz.
Alucard laughs a little though, then guides Trevor to their last spot. One of the meat vendors, rushed and overwhelmed. Alucard knows them and knows that now isn't the time to talk. He gets a full bird and some hind quarters, and that's that. Tasks Trevor with carrying the bag, and then?
Then they wind their way home. The streets have more people now. A few that know Alucard and say hello, but understand that he's coming home from shopping and needs to keep his forward momentum. He has a patient, proably.
He unlocks the door. Heads in and immediately starts unpacking the groceries.]
Thank you for your help with the bags.
We need stronger shit than wine, don't we?
[ He says that, but he must have managed to get a little drunk. Or maybe he's been trying to not talk honestly for so long he's lost the ability to stop himself once he starts. Because he keeps staring at the ceiling, but his attention is on Alucard. ]
Would you have wanted us here? The same way- the same way we wanted each other there?
[ He says that, but he must have managed to get a little drunk. Or maybe he's been trying to not talk honestly for so long he's lost the ability to stop himself once he starts. Because he keeps staring at the ceiling, but his attention is on Alucard. ]
Would you have wanted us here? The same way- the same way we wanted each other there?
Probably. But we don't have that, and I'm not getting up to see if I'm wrong.
[He wants to close his eyes, but it doesn't happen. He can't. He isn't safe if he does.]
How do you mean?
[He wants to close his eyes, but it doesn't happen. He can't. He isn't safe if he does.]
How do you mean?
Of course.
[ He's learned where a few things go by now and he puts those things where they ought to be, but putting things away is still a job that's mostly Alucard. Instead, he just clings to his flowers. ]
Is it always like that there? With the people and the noises and the hens?
[ He's learned where a few things go by now and he puts those things where they ought to be, but putting things away is still a job that's mostly Alucard. Instead, he just clings to his flowers. ]
Is it always like that there? With the people and the noises and the hens?
[The fish and chicken get placed in the cool spot for now, a thing ALucard's rigged up. It'll keep for two days - the fish will spoil first, so it'll get eaten later today. The fruit goes into a bowl on the counter, the vegetables under one of the counters. The honey? That he keeps out, taking down a single cup from a small rack.]
Mmhmm. We went early, so it's less crowded than normal.
[He opens the jar, pouring a little bit into the cup for Trevor before offering it to the fae.]
Here. I don't know how much you want right now, but it's a start.
Mmhmm. We went early, so it's less crowded than normal.
[He opens the jar, pouring a little bit into the cup for Trevor before offering it to the fae.]
Here. I don't know how much you want right now, but it's a start.
You know-
[ Except clearly he doesn't. And- shit, that probably isn't an appropriate thing to ask Alucard after recent events. Even if he did want to be part of - whatever it is he and Sypha have nowadays - he almost certainly doesn't care for the idea anymore. ]
-nevermind. Sorry, asshole question to ask you.
[ Except clearly he doesn't. And- shit, that probably isn't an appropriate thing to ask Alucard after recent events. Even if he did want to be part of - whatever it is he and Sypha have nowadays - he almost certainly doesn't care for the idea anymore. ]
-nevermind. Sorry, asshole question to ask you.
[..........oh.
Fuck.
He does close his eyes at this point. Shifts, so it's forehead resting on his knees and his face buried. There's no clearer I would have he can say.
Everything's been burnt to ashes. Again.]
You have your answer.
Fuck.
He does close his eyes at this point. Shifts, so it's forehead resting on his knees and his face buried. There's no clearer I would have he can say.
Everything's been burnt to ashes. Again.]
You have your answer.
It's plenty.
[ He drains the cup as well as the qualities of honey actually allow, then sheds a few moths. They crawl over the cup, eating at the leftover honey. A few more land on the flowers as he looks around for a place to put them. ]
Do you have a vase? Or a tall cup?
[ He drains the cup as well as the qualities of honey actually allow, then sheds a few moths. They crawl over the cup, eating at the leftover honey. A few more land on the flowers as he looks around for a place to put them. ]
Do you have a vase? Or a tall cup?
[He's gotten used to the moths falling off of Trevor, doing things, then returning. He doesn't blink at it anymore. Just walks over to a small shelf of books and other things, which has a cabinet underneath. From there a tall vase -chipped and beat to hell, but a beautiful peacock blue-green - emerges, and Alucard offers it.]
Will this do?
Will this do?
Suppose I do.
[ It's pointless to think about now. It's stupid to wish that things were different, that he could just reach out and pull Alucard close and make things better. He can't even make things better by pulling Sypha close, and she likes being held. ]
We- fuck. [ Even now, he can't bring himself to say it aloud. ] Both of us, I think. I know it doesn't mean shit now. Can't mean shit.
It's bullshit, isn't it? That it can all go so wrong.
[ It's pointless to think about now. It's stupid to wish that things were different, that he could just reach out and pull Alucard close and make things better. He can't even make things better by pulling Sypha close, and she likes being held. ]
We- fuck. [ Even now, he can't bring himself to say it aloud. ] Both of us, I think. I know it doesn't mean shit now. Can't mean shit.
It's bullshit, isn't it? That it can all go so wrong.
It is bullshit.
[And so horrifying.]
One action changes a person's entire world. Yet the rest of the world around us moves on and doesn't care.
[He understands his father so much better now.]
Better to shut the world out and avoid that.
[And so horrifying.]
One action changes a person's entire world. Yet the rest of the world around us moves on and doesn't care.
[He understands his father so much better now.]
Better to shut the world out and avoid that.
It's perfect.
[ He puts the flowers in there. Water can happen later, he'll need to bring some in anyway. It's one of the jobs he's decided is his. ]
Thank you. For all of this.
[ He puts the flowers in there. Water can happen later, he'll need to bring some in anyway. It's one of the jobs he's decided is his. ]
Thank you. For all of this.
[Alucard's cede the water bringing as a Trevor job. And grateful for it, because it means he doesn't have to walk when his feet are still sore.
Speaking of. He makes his way over to the sofa, knowing he'll have to stand for a little while to make breakfast. He's earned himself a break.]
I'm glad you enjoyed it. And thank you for the flowers.
Speaking of. He makes his way over to the sofa, knowing he'll have to stand for a little while to make breakfast. He's earned himself a break.]
I'm glad you enjoyed it. And thank you for the flowers.
Isn't that just the story. [ A sigh. ] Isn't that just every fucking story there is, sooner or later. One stupid, selfish, fearful person. Doing one stupid, selfish, fearful thing.
[ He doesn't touch Alucard, but he buries his fingers in the edge of the blanket. Just enough that it shifts slightly against him. Like a pup tugging at clothing. ]
When it's easier - it if ever gets easier - we'll be here. If we go, we'll come back. So long as we have legs to make the journey on.
[ He doesn't touch Alucard, but he buries his fingers in the edge of the blanket. Just enough that it shifts slightly against him. Like a pup tugging at clothing. ]
When it's easier - it if ever gets easier - we'll be here. If we go, we'll come back. So long as we have legs to make the journey on.
I did what she would have wanted. What you gave me the Hold for.
[There's such misery in the words that squeak out. Alucard's managed to hide his misery from the other two until this, even with the matter of his mother's death. This? This is something so very different.
He doesn't even acknowledge that Trevor's tugging at the blanket. It's just happening around him.]
What if it doesn't get easier, Belmont?
[There's such misery in the words that squeak out. Alucard's managed to hide his misery from the other two until this, even with the matter of his mother's death. This? This is something so very different.
He doesn't even acknowledge that Trevor's tugging at the blanket. It's just happening around him.]
What if it doesn't get easier, Belmont?
I know. Sometimes- sometimes you do everything right, and the world just decides to kick you in the teeth for it anyway.
[ There's nothing more he can do, is there? Other than just be here on a sofa too soft for his bones with wine that isn't going to get him drunk. ]
Then we're here anyway. We're here, and you can be part of- whatever the fuck it is that we are, if you want to be. We just figure out how to make it work.
[ There's nothing more he can do, is there? Other than just be here on a sofa too soft for his bones with wine that isn't going to get him drunk. ]
Then we're here anyway. We're here, and you can be part of- whatever the fuck it is that we are, if you want to be. We just figure out how to make it work.
Just wait. They'll be even better once I'm gone.
[ Not flowers anymore, but better. He moves over to sit with Alucard, bringing his knees up to his chest to smile over them. ]
Adrian?
[ Not flowers anymore, but better. He moves over to sit with Alucard, bringing his knees up to his chest to smile over them. ]
Adrian?
I should've expected something. Not just...
[Been a soft thing. Who trusted people. When the fuck did that ever work out from him?]
If it doesn't work though, Belmont. What then?
[Been a soft thing. Who trusted people. When the fuck did that ever work out from him?]
If it doesn't work though, Belmont. What then?
Yes?
[He glances over, tilting his head at Trevor.]
[He glances over, tilting his head at Trevor.]
What would you have done differently, if you did expect something? Would you have turned them away when they needed help?
[ He shakes his head. ]
It will. We'll just- need to figure out what it working looks like. Maybe nothing ever changes, but we all know you're welcome if you're ever ready, and that alone is different.
[ He shakes his head. ]
It will. We'll just- need to figure out what it working looks like. Maybe nothing ever changes, but we all know you're welcome if you're ever ready, and that alone is different.
May I kiss you? While I still taste like honey?
[ The ideal sort of time to be kissing someone, tbh. ]
[ The ideal sort of time to be kissing someone, tbh. ]
If I had known where this meant to end? Yes.
[He could've chased them away. Or sent them elsewhere. Denied who he was or any number of things.
But he didn't. He didn't because he wanted to be the son his mother would want, and the custodian of the Hold that Trevor might appreciate. He didn't because he was so fucking lonely and that part hasn't changed.
There's something to how convinced Trevor is that this can change. That's what breaks him, finally. What gets a tiny, strangled sob out of Alucard's throat, hardly caring that Trevor's hearing the noise.]
[He could've chased them away. Or sent them elsewhere. Denied who he was or any number of things.
But he didn't. He didn't because he wanted to be the son his mother would want, and the custodian of the Hold that Trevor might appreciate. He didn't because he was so fucking lonely and that part hasn't changed.
There's something to how convinced Trevor is that this can change. That's what breaks him, finally. What gets a tiny, strangled sob out of Alucard's throat, hardly caring that Trevor's hearing the noise.]
[Oh.
Oh.
Alucard's cheeks flush, but his response? Is to angle his face upwards to Trevor.]
Yes. Please.
Oh.
Alucard's cheeks flush, but his response? Is to angle his face upwards to Trevor.]
Yes. Please.
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