That's the least comfortable chair here. [His father loved that chair, his mother hated it, Alucard agreed with mom. But good. She's resting, and not on the floor.
Alucard does laugh a little at Trevor's attempt to imitate Sypha's state, but then? Then he sobers up terribly.]
[ He sighs at that. Sypha will assume he's trying to get them to stop. She knows better than Alucard does that things like him aren't trustworthy. He looks about, then tries clumsily to change the topic. ]
[ That changes the stakes here, doesn’t it? He’s asking Alucard to give up his last connection to his family to survive. Sypha will lose her means to protect people, but she’ll also lose the things that she needs to protect them from. He thought he was asking the most of her.
...whatever happens at dawn, one of them loses all they have left of the people they love. ]
I was too young to remember meeting them. My sisters just said that they were clever. Father never talked about them. I know- I know they helped to make us like this. [ Making him and his siblings into Dhampir, he means. ] And that without that, we'd have had to die.
If they'd have wanted magic to stay, then I owe them it.
[ He tries to think of something. He really does. But the truth is, none of them really have anything to talk about that isn't emotionally fraught. Strategy, the place they're in now, Sypha and her awful tea, the book in front of him, magic. Even the awful dragon chair. All of them are tied up in uncomfortable feelings. And it's hard for him to tell what's bad and what's not, the grief still being so fresh. Nothing's really sunk in deeply enough yet to act on it. He's tried complaining about Sypha, which he feels is a good and inoffensive topic, but Alucard doesn't like it much. ]
Is- that what all humans eat? The meat-leather?
[ Because Leon insisted on teaching him and his sisters to cook, even if none of them really needed to eat human food. And exactly 0 of it was dried meat. None of it was a soldier's rations at all, even though he was undoubtedly familiar with them. ]
[ It's a genuine question, not an attempt at calling Alucard out for eating what has the best ration of nutrients to ease to come by. Even if maybe the topic of eating is also not a good one, considering recent events. ]
I don't think I've ever known anyone's favourite food. Is that yours? The leather meat?
[Alucard takes a sip of the awful tea. His face curdles, and so that? That means he chugs the rest down in one fell swoop. God. It isn't going to work, why did he just do that?
His face contorts. Easier to focus on Trevor's question.]
I don't think I have a favorite anymore. I don't have the luxury of enjoying meals.
Oh. Not leather-meat. And probably not old blood tea.
[ Well. Now he knows two foods that AREN'T Alucard's favourite. That's a start! Not a GOOD start to his attempts to know things about people, but a start. ]
...do you think she has a favourite?
[ Not that he's going back and forth about whether he has a crush on Sypha or hates her or anything. ]
Least I can do. You're- you know. Like this because you're helping me.
[ He looks back at his book. In truth? He's kind of glad to not be reading it anymore. Maybe he should put it back. Books, it turns out, are Upsetting. ]
[ He doesn't know what to do when the humans are asleep. Until now he's been reading, Sypha gets frustrated that he knows so little about humanity when he's trying to make decisions for them. But he doesn't like reading. It was nice at first, but then the books kept being about upsetting things.
He tries, for a while, but then he finds himself putting the book back and hovering over the humans instead. Sypha hates it when he does that. She doesn't like the idea of a vampire watching her sleep.
But if he didn't watch, he wouldn't notice things. Notice how still Alucard is, compared to Sypha. Notice when that stillness is broken by tiny shivers, so small that he wouldn't have picked up on them before his senses were sharpened by the blood.
He knows enough to be aware that it's improper to curl up against a person while they're asleep when he's human-shaped. But dog shaped? That seems normal. A moment's consideration and he's a wolf with dark, shaggy fur, trying to find room to curl up on the Sofa next to Alucard, burying his way between his arms. ]
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Alucard does laugh a little at Trevor's attempt to imitate Sypha's state, but then? Then he sobers up terribly.]
Why would we want that?
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[ But it's a serious topic, not one for laughing at Sypha. ]
If this turns out to be impossible. There's no reason for you both to die if we fail.
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[ He'd thought this would be an easier sell. Just don't die. Humans are stubborn. ]
I'm not saying we shouldn't try. But if anything happens to me, there's no need for the two of you to die there.
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[Different? Complicated? Alucard trails off, and he simply sighs.]
Talk to Sypha about it. I think that if I go forward with anything or not should be my choice and mine alone.
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[ He sighs at that. Sypha will assume he's trying to get them to stop. She knows better than Alucard does that things like him aren't trustworthy. He looks about, then tries clumsily to change the topic. ]
What is magic, for you?
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[It's a response drenched in sentiment, and Alucard's eyes move to the whole Hold around them. His fingers curl against the fabric of the sofa.]
It helps me defend myself, but for the decade that I've been traveling Wallachia's countryside? Magic has been the only tether to home and my parents.
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[ That changes the stakes here, doesn’t it? He’s asking Alucard to give up his last connection to his family to survive. Sypha will lose her means to protect people, but she’ll also lose the things that she needs to protect them from. He thought he was asking the most of her.
...whatever happens at dawn, one of them loses all they have left of the people they love. ]
What were they like?
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[Alucard's heart leaps into his mouth, blocking his ability to continue. There is only pained silence in response to Trevor's question.
Out of instinct, Alucard wants to curl up. He doesn't, and he knows he can't trail off either. After a deep breath, he just manages:]
wonderful. And they cared so much.
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I was too young to remember meeting them. My sisters just said that they were clever. Father never talked about them. I know- I know they helped to make us like this. [ Making him and his siblings into Dhampir, he means. ] And that without that, we'd have had to die.
If they'd have wanted magic to stay, then I owe them it.
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[That's the version of the truth Alucard is sticking with. It's easier to deal with.]
Can we please talk about something else?
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[ He tries to think of something. He really does. But the truth is, none of them really have anything to talk about that isn't emotionally fraught. Strategy, the place they're in now, Sypha and her awful tea, the book in front of him, magic. Even the awful dragon chair. All of them are tied up in uncomfortable feelings. And it's hard for him to tell what's bad and what's not, the grief still being so fresh. Nothing's really sunk in deeply enough yet to act on it. He's tried complaining about Sypha, which he feels is a good and inoffensive topic, but Alucard doesn't like it much. ]
Is- that what all humans eat? The meat-leather?
[ Because Leon insisted on teaching him and his sisters to cook, even if none of them really needed to eat human food. And exactly 0 of it was dried meat. None of it was a soldier's rations at all, even though he was undoubtedly familiar with them. ]
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[Alucard feels himself grow a little light headed. He sighs, reaching out to take the tea.]
I mostly eat this though. Easy to carry around and eat.
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[ It's a genuine question, not an attempt at calling Alucard out for eating what has the best ration of nutrients to ease to come by. Even if maybe the topic of eating is also not a good one, considering recent events. ]
I don't think I've ever known anyone's favourite food. Is that yours? The leather meat?
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[Alucard takes a sip of the awful tea. His face curdles, and so that? That means he chugs the rest down in one fell swoop. God. It isn't going to work, why did he just do that?
His face contorts. Easier to focus on Trevor's question.]
I don't think I have a favorite anymore. I don't have the luxury of enjoying meals.
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[ Well. Now he knows two foods that AREN'T Alucard's favourite. That's a start! Not a GOOD start to his attempts to know things about people, but a start. ]
...do you think she has a favourite?
[ Not that he's going back and forth about whether he has a crush on Sypha or hates her or anything. ]
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[Alucard stops, then looks down at his lap. Trevor's coat is still there and....]
Sorry, did you want your coat back? I realize you probably don't feel the chill as badly as we do, but...
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[ He doesn't exactly need it back, but it feels odd not to be wearing it. ]
I didn't know what you needed. For the blood. I get warmer if I take blood, so I thought that you might be colder.
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[Alucard won't allow fires here, for obvious reasons. This'll do.]
Thank you.
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[ He looks back at his book. In truth? He's kind of glad to not be reading it anymore. Maybe he should put it back. Books, it turns out, are Upsetting. ]
You want me to let you sleep?
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[Alucard sighs, then settles back down onto the sofa. He really ought to sleep, huh?]
I think it would be wise. Wake me if something happens between now and morning.
[With that? He settles back onto the sofa properly, face mushed into the cushiosn and darkness around him. Alucard is so quiet, so still, and....
...asleep.]
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He tries, for a while, but then he finds himself putting the book back and hovering over the humans instead. Sypha hates it when he does that. She doesn't like the idea of a vampire watching her sleep.
But if he didn't watch, he wouldn't notice things. Notice how still Alucard is, compared to Sypha. Notice when that stillness is broken by tiny shivers, so small that he wouldn't have picked up on them before his senses were sharpened by the blood.
He knows enough to be aware that it's improper to curl up against a person while they're asleep when he's human-shaped. But dog shaped? That seems normal. A moment's consideration and he's a wolf with dark, shaggy fur, trying to find room to curl up on the Sofa next to Alucard, burying his way between his arms. ]