[ The den is back, and with it the colours. They're muted but they're there, and he's used to the constant brightness and ringing but it's boring into him now.
He'd probably like to keep carrying Alucard around for a happier time, if he was in the right place to make that decision. As it is, it gets them home faster. It means that Alucard doesn't have to make the agonising walk from here to the gate. The trip back will still be less than pleasant, but he can spare him a little.
He gathers Alucard up in his arms, making sure he has the book with him. ]
Cover your eyes. I'll tell you when we're at the gate, so you can brace yourself.
[Alucard is set to protest that he can walk, it's fine. But based on Trevor's mood? Clearly now is not the time. So he lets himself be carried about, and he strokes Trevor's hair gently. Something's wrong. Trevor just isn't saying what.
[ He just needs to last until they're through the gate. He can't be weak here. He cannot be weak here. ]
Just- just stay with me.
[ He keeps Alucard tight to his chest, and when Alucard's hands stroke through his hair, he feels like something's clamped around his heart. ]
Hang on. We're going through.
[ It's no more pleasant on the return. But it's over quickly. He takes a few more steps - unsteady, now, from the strain of moving between worlds - before placing Alucard down on the grass. A moment later, he lets himself collapse down beside him.
[Alucard feels as if he's been turned inside out entirely when they pass through the gate. He clings to Trevor just a little harder. Tries not to make a noise, and---
--they're done. Done, and Alucard opens his eyes and the colors don't hurt.
But then Trevor's on the ground. Alucard scrambles over as quickly as he can, hands flying to rest on Trevor's side.]
Alucard doesn't hesitate to wrap his arms around Trevor and pull him in close. Keep him there, stroking his hair and saying nothing at all. He can be nothing more than a wonderful and perfect and useful leaning post for the time being, taking in what feels like a lot of held in emotions.
He just holds the Belmont, stroking his hair. Eventually trying to pull all of him against Alucard's chest, and failing in a wonderful way.]
[ It's very muffled, both by shirt and by Trevor's own choked voice. It's- angry almost. He's furious with himself. He's happy. He wants to just be happy. That's how this is supposed to go. ]
[ He does. He clings to Alucard, so fragile and lovely, and cries until his head aches from it. It's humiliating, the way everything hits at once and hits so hard.
His sisters are gone. Leon is gone. Until minutes ago, he'd had nothing left in the world but the time-locked ghost of a dog. And now he has two humans, and somehow that's harder than having nothing at all.
Eventually the sobbing stops and he falls still. It's a while after that that he actually talks. ]
Can we try that again, some other time? The magic and the- [ kissing. ] -everything else.
[Alucard does nothing more. Trevor has to ride this out, and he knows that the best he can do is just be physically present. It sucks. But it could be so much worse.
He continues and continues holding. Being quiet.
And then when Trevor asks, he only has one question in response:]
[ The laugh he gets in response to that is weak, but genuine. ]
The rest- I think the rest would be best here. [ The kissing, but also the gathering Alucard up and carrying him around. He'd like to do more of that, too. ]
[ He almost asks if he can carry Alucard again, but right now even his own weight feels almost too much. He pushes himself up unsteadily, half floating so as not to have to carry his own weight on his shaking legs. ]
I- both of you?
[ Alucard said that, didn’t he? That they both love him. ]
[ He's cautious about putting his weight onto Alucard. It takes him a few more steps of mostly floating, but eventually, eventually, he does. It feels wrong, to be the one to lean on the others. But maybe- maybe right now it's what he needs. He can go back to carrying everyone else's weight later. ]
Can we just- I don't know. Go somewhere to sit down? And I just- you're just there. With me.
[Alucard keeps leading. Arm around Trevor. Going up each stair, step by human step. Continuing until they're in the library itself, and Alucard can steer them over to the comfiest of sofas.]
[ By the time they reach the library, he feels a little more steady. Still uncomfortably vulnerable, but stronger. He sits and extends his arms to try to make it clearer what he's asking of Alucard.
To be a rock for him to cling to, just for a little while longer. ]
[Alucard absolutely just sits down. Not next to Trevor, but in his lap. If the Belmont wants him elsewhere, he'll have to say so. Because from here, Alucard can be something warm that the dhampir wraps himself around. A constant heartbeat.]
[ It's not what he expected. Not even what he hoped for. It's better, and he coils his arms around Alucard.
His humans. His very own humans, who'll always come back for him. ]
I- think I- [ The words are difficult, like saying them is a little too vulnerable even for this moment. He mushes his face into Alucard's chest, mumbling them above his heart so they're barely audible. So he's not putting the words into the air where they can break. ]
[Alucard presses a kiss to the top of Trevor's head. Then another. Letting the Belmont just mush his face into tiddies, and in the back of his mind? He rather likes that.]
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Let's go then.
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He'd probably like to keep carrying Alucard around for a happier time, if he was in the right place to make that decision. As it is, it gets them home faster. It means that Alucard doesn't have to make the agonising walk from here to the gate. The trip back will still be less than pleasant, but he can spare him a little.
He gathers Alucard up in his arms, making sure he has the book with him. ]
Cover your eyes. I'll tell you when we're at the gate, so you can brace yourself.
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He's quiet, and closes his eyes as asked.]
Okay. Do you need me to do anything else?
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Just- just stay with me.
[ He keeps Alucard tight to his chest, and when Alucard's hands stroke through his hair, he feels like something's clamped around his heart. ]
Hang on. We're going through.
[ It's no more pleasant on the return. But it's over quickly. He takes a few more steps - unsteady, now, from the strain of moving between worlds - before placing Alucard down on the grass. A moment later, he lets himself collapse down beside him.
And for a moment, he just seems lost. ]
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--they're done. Done, and Alucard opens his eyes and the colors don't hurt.
But then Trevor's on the ground. Alucard scrambles over as quickly as he can, hands flying to rest on Trevor's side.]
Belmont?!
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It's quiet, except for the way his breaths catch. But the shirt's starting to grow damp. ]
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Oh.
Alucard doesn't hesitate to wrap his arms around Trevor and pull him in close. Keep him there, stroking his hair and saying nothing at all. He can be nothing more than a wonderful and perfect and useful leaning post for the time being, taking in what feels like a lot of held in emotions.
He just holds the Belmont, stroking his hair. Eventually trying to pull all of him against Alucard's chest, and failing in a wonderful way.]
I'm here. I have you.
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[ It's very muffled, both by shirt and by Trevor's own choked voice. It's- angry almost. He's furious with himself. He's happy. He wants to just be happy. That's how this is supposed to go. ]
I'm glad. I swear I am. I just-. Shit.
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Just ride everything out. I understand.
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His sisters are gone. Leon is gone. Until minutes ago, he'd had nothing left in the world but the time-locked ghost of a dog. And now he has two humans, and somehow that's harder than having nothing at all.
Eventually the sobbing stops and he falls still. It's a while after that that he actually talks. ]
Can we try that again, some other time? The magic and the- [ kissing. ] -everything else.
I ruined it this time.
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He continues and continues holding. Being quiet.
And then when Trevor asks, he only has one question in response:]
Do we have to go all the way back to Hell?
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[ The laugh he gets in response to that is weak, but genuine. ]
The rest- I think the rest would be best here. [ The kissing, but also the gathering Alucard up and carrying him around. He'd like to do more of that, too. ]
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[Alucard pats Trevor softly, then nudges him.]
Let's get inside.
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[ He almost asks if he can carry Alucard again, but right now even his own weight feels almost too much. He pushes himself up unsteadily, half floating so as not to have to carry his own weight on his shaking legs. ]
I- both of you?
[ Alucard said that, didn’t he? That they both love him. ]
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[It's Alucard's turn to offer Trevor his arm.]
We just weren't sure how. This seemed as good a time as any.
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[ He's cautious about putting his weight onto Alucard. It takes him a few more steps of mostly floating, but eventually, eventually, he does. It feels wrong, to be the one to lean on the others. But maybe- maybe right now it's what he needs. He can go back to carrying everyone else's weight later. ]
Can we just- I don't know. Go somewhere to sit down? And I just- you're just there. With me.
[ Cuddling, is the word he's looking for. ]
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[Alucard keeps leading. Arm around Trevor. Going up each stair, step by human step. Continuing until they're in the library itself, and Alucard can steer them over to the comfiest of sofas.]
You sit down first.
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To be a rock for him to cling to, just for a little while longer. ]
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His humans. His very own humans, who'll always come back for him. ]
I- think I- [ The words are difficult, like saying them is a little too vulnerable even for this moment. He mushes his face into Alucard's chest, mumbling them above his heart so they're barely audible. So he's not putting the words into the air where they can break. ]
-I love you, too. Both of you.
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[Alucard presses a kiss to the top of Trevor's head. Then another. Letting the Belmont just mush his face into tiddies, and in the back of his mind? He rather likes that.]
Let's wait for her here.