I won't. I'll stay as long as I can, and then wait for you outside.
[ He does leave before long, in the end, moving to a cooler adjoining room to wait for Alucard. The loss of dust isn't too bad - nothing dangerous, so long as he doesn't need to hunt within the next few hours. Less protecting him from the cold, but it's not exactly a cold place. He probably couldn't fly if he needed to right now, but then he wouldn't be doing that while disguised as a human anyway. The only real change is feeling a little more vulnerable.
And the only real effect of that is wanting to bury himself in Alucard's arms when he emerges. He doesn't, but oh, he wants to. ]
[Alucard takes less time than he might normally for this bath. When Trevor leaves he goes into the pool, washes himself properly, then comes back out. His long hair is so very wet, and the rest of him still warm and a little sweaty.]
I am.
[There's such an instinct to take Trevor's hand. But he doesn't.]
[ The bath itself might be strange and a little uncomfortable, but he thinks he likes Alucard like this. All warm and flushed and content, with water dripping down from his hair, relaxed completely.
He’s seen him happy a lot over the last few days, but it hasn’t lost its wonder. He looks around carefully, then leans in to whisper. ]
Alucard knows he's blushing. He's warm all over but warmest in his cheeks. So he's blushing.]
Yes. I'd like that.
[A lot. A lot. So they get their things, which also means clothes, and meeting the cool night air. They're far from the waters in this part of the city, but tonight the breeze has moved very well up the harbor.
Alucard's hair flutters in that breeze as he walks them both back home, as do his clothes. Sypha ought to be asleep by now, and there's no greeting when he unlocks the door. Just soft snoring.
[ The walk back is pleasant, the night air feeling cool for once after the heat of the baths. He still feels heavier than usual, weaker, but not unsafe. Just a little more open. A little more vulnerable. Less invincible, in comparison to the delicate humans here.
And so the moment the door is closed, he's close to Alucard. It feels safer that way for both of them. As Alucard trails off, he brings a hand up to his flushes cheek, smiling.
And then he leans in to kiss him. There's no taste of honey, this time, and no soft dusty texture to his skin. But it's still soft. Still careful and affectionate. ]
[There's nothing but happiness when Alucard leans in, bridging the gap between them both.
What he isn't is guarded. At least he's less guarded than he's ever been before, because one hand rests on Trevor's hip. His mouth opens just a little, coaxing. Saying that this is okay. He's ready for something just a little bit more.]
[ He's nervous about more. He's done this before, a few times, but usually with his own kind who are, as a rule- things go a lot faster, with them. It makes it altogether unclear when kissing things stop being kissing things and start being sex things, and the last thing he wants is to go too far.
But a little further, maybe a little further is fine. He leans in closer. Places a hand on Alucard's back to press them both together. Presses his lips more firmly against Alucard's, using them to push his mouth open further. ]
[Alucard knows this is his own limit for now. But it's a good limit to have, because he does press against Trevor. Grips his hip a little tighter, opens his mouth more. Angles it so that his hair brushes over the hand on his back and oh, oh he hasn't felt his heart hammer like this in years.
[ He doesn't deepen the kiss further, but when he breaks it it's to bend down and lift Alucard, holding him against his chest. He's warm. He's so warm and his hair is just slightly damp still and he smells of clean water and night air and he doesn't think he wants to let go. ]
Let me stay with you? Just- just stay. Not anything else.
[This is perfect. All of it. The way the kiss breaks. The way Trevor scoops him up, and the way Alucard's head finds itself settling against Trevor's chest. He loops one arm around Trevor's back to make himself comfortable, and the other rests on Trevor's shoulder because it can.]
I'd like that very much, I think.
[There's a kiss on Trevor's cheek for that. Just a reinforcement that this? This is wanted.]
[ This? This is all that he's wanted for a long time. For seven years. Since he stole a human from a fire and decided that he wanted to play house with it. But the wanting has changed. It had been selfish and stubborn, before, no matter how graceful he managed to be in not getting what he wanted. He'd been told that there was something he couldn't have and so, naturally, he would have done anything to have it.
Now - Alucard is not a 'something', for a start. He's brilliant and kind and when he smiles the air feels lighter, so much so that until now all of this has seemed to be second to making him smile more. It's only now that Alucard is in his arms, rested against him chest, that it becomes painfully clear that he never stopped wanting it. Just started wanting it for different reasons.
Alucard's lips touch his cheek, and he turns his head quickly to catch them with his own. Only briefly, before squeezing him tighter against his chest. ]
Should I- upstairs?
[ Very eloquent. He could just sit down on the and it wouldn't be quite so potentially-too-much, but then he'd eventually have to move to allow Alucard to go to bed. It seems more efficient to remove that middle step entirely. ]
[ It might be too small, in truth. But what is that other than an excuse to pull Alucard tighter to him, to be as small as possible? He starts up the stairs, pausing every few steps to press tiny kisses to Alucard's face. ]
[ It takes a while with all the pauses, but eventually he makes it upstairs and to the bed, perching on the edge of it to lower Alucard onto the cool sheets. He leans over him, reaching out to comb his fingers through his slightly-damp hair.
It probably is going to be something of a squeeze to get the both of them in there. Worth the effort, though. Well worth it. ]
I think I like when you say what you want. [ He doesn't do that much, and Trevor gets the feeling that he barely does it at all around anyone else. So much of the conversation around their- whatever it is - has been focused on what he can manage. What feels safe. What he wants has fallen to the side somewhat. And outside of that? Just about everything has been for some patient or another. ] You ought to do it more often.
[ There's a certain irony, isn't there, to him asking Alucard to be more selfish because he likes it? He doesn't muse on it too much, because he doesn't really feel like musing on anything right now. It would take his attention away from the present for too many precious seconds.
He hands the nightshirt over, suddenly left with a concern that he hasn't needed to think about while he's been sleeping as a swarm of moths. ]
Should I- wear anything? Are human clothes good for sleeping in? I've not been sleeping in this shape since I arrived.
You don't need to change. Unless you wish to, there is a spare shirt in the trunk at the foot of the bed.
[Alucard is quick to change. His shirt comes off, the night shirt goes on. Then he fusses with trousers, and it takes barely a minute. He's perhaps a little egged on at the prospect of just curling up close against Trevor.]
[ He gives it a little thought before stripping down to just the tunic. It seems appropriate enough, long enough to cover him but less overly warm than all of the layers of the day. In truth, he wouldn't feel particularly embarassed about wearing nothing - none of his moths wear anything, after all - but humans do attach meaning to things like that.
He does watch Alucard change, though. He wasn't wearing anything at all not long ago, so it doesn't seem too untoward. His gaze is soft, happy. ]
You got so beautiful, here.
[ He was beautiful before, of course. At least once he wasn't so starved and scared and hurt. But seven years of not being starved and scared and hurt has done wonders. ]
[He does smile when he speaks though, meaning all of it is in good jest. But more than that, he just remains on the very edge of the bed, waiting for Trevor to settle in. Trevor is bigger - wider - than he is. Easier for him to find a spot and then Alucard to take up all the remaining space.]
I was right to try and get to this city. But I don't think I would have survived it without your intervention first.
I could. [ He climbs into the bed, making himself as small as he can without shedding more parts of himself against the wall. He reaches out for Alucard. ]
Would you prefer handsome? Lovely? Clever and kind and- [ His hands brush over Alucard's nightshirt and he grips at the coth of it for a moment, smiling. ] -there aren't words. Not in any language I've ever spoken.
[He inches up against Trevor after he's sure the fae is settled. Alucard doesn't mush his face against Trevor though - he keeps them close. Noses touching. One hand over Trevor's hip, the other occupying the small gap between them both. He smiles, so soft and satisfied and happy.]
When there's no language left, there's only action.
[ He wanted this years ago, in the big, too-puffy bed in the cottage. To lie this close to Alucard. To speak to him in whispers, soft and conspiratorial, the sound absorbed by the cloth of the blankets before it could hope to get more than a few inches away from them. The whole world shrunk to just two people and the tiny space between them.
It's everything he imagined.
He stretches one arm over Alucard, pulling him in closer. The fingers of the other hand lie between the pillow and Alucard's cheek, stroking softly. He smiles, letting his legs brush against Alucard's. ]
I don't know that there'll ever be actions, either. Not enough. [ But he leans forward to kiss Alucard. ] I'll do what I can.
[The kiss that follows is everything Alucard can't say. Thank you for pulling me away from myself. Thank you for insisting I heal. Thank you for placing me where I needed to be. He holds Trevor close and closes his eyes, losing more and more in the kiss. You're here and I want you to stay. You're here and I'm scared of being this happy but I want it all the same.
Alucard doesn't know how long the kiss goes on for. All he knows is that he's poured all of himself into it.]
[ He kisses Alucard back. And theoretically, it's less deep than the kiss when they came in. Just lips against lips, over and over. Nothing more. But at the same time there's a desperation to it. An attempt to communicate all those things there aren't words for. ]
I love you. [ He says it so easily when he finally pulls away, faces so close that Alucard's eyes take up the entirety of his vision. ]
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[ He does leave before long, in the end, moving to a cooler adjoining room to wait for Alucard. The loss of dust isn't too bad - nothing dangerous, so long as he doesn't need to hunt within the next few hours. Less protecting him from the cold, but it's not exactly a cold place. He probably couldn't fly if he needed to right now, but then he wouldn't be doing that while disguised as a human anyway. The only real change is feeling a little more vulnerable.
And the only real effect of that is wanting to bury himself in Alucard's arms when he emerges. He doesn't, but oh, he wants to. ]
You're all clean?
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I am.
[There's such an instinct to take Trevor's hand. But he doesn't.]
Let's get our things and head home?
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[ The bath itself might be strange and a little uncomfortable, but he thinks he likes Alucard like this. All warm and flushed and content, with water dripping down from his hair, relaxed completely.
He’s seen him happy a lot over the last few days, but it hasn’t lost its wonder. He looks around carefully, then leans in to whisper. ]
May I kiss you? When we’re home.
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Alucard knows he's blushing. He's warm all over but warmest in his cheeks. So he's blushing.]
Yes. I'd like that.
[A lot. A lot. So they get their things, which also means clothes, and meeting the cool night air. They're far from the waters in this part of the city, but tonight the breeze has moved very well up the harbor.
Alucard's hair flutters in that breeze as he walks them both back home, as do his clothes. Sypha ought to be asleep by now, and there's no greeting when he unlocks the door. Just soft snoring.
He looks to Trevor once he's closed the door.]
Where would you like to...?
[He can't even think the word without going red.]
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And so the moment the door is closed, he's close to Alucard. It feels safer that way for both of them. As Alucard trails off, he brings a hand up to his flushes cheek, smiling.
And then he leans in to kiss him. There's no taste of honey, this time, and no soft dusty texture to his skin. But it's still soft. Still careful and affectionate. ]
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What he isn't is guarded. At least he's less guarded than he's ever been before, because one hand rests on Trevor's hip. His mouth opens just a little, coaxing. Saying that this is okay. He's ready for something just a little bit more.]
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But a little further, maybe a little further is fine. He leans in closer. Places a hand on Alucard's back to press them both together. Presses his lips more firmly against Alucard's, using them to push his mouth open further. ]
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He's never felt it hammer for a good reason.]
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Let me stay with you? Just- just stay. Not anything else.
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I'd like that very much, I think.
[There's a kiss on Trevor's cheek for that. Just a reinforcement that this? This is wanted.]
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Now - Alucard is not a 'something', for a start. He's brilliant and kind and when he smiles the air feels lighter, so much so that until now all of this has seemed to be second to making him smile more. It's only now that Alucard is in his arms, rested against him chest, that it becomes painfully clear that he never stopped wanting it. Just started wanting it for different reasons.
Alucard's lips touch his cheek, and he turns his head quickly to catch them with his own. Only briefly, before squeezing him tighter against his chest. ]
Should I- upstairs?
[ Very eloquent. He could just sit down on the and it wouldn't be quite so potentially-too-much, but then he'd eventually have to move to allow Alucard to go to bed. It seems more efficient to remove that middle step entirely. ]
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[It's a little tight. It's a little much. It's fine. It's perfect.]
The bed won't be too small for you, will it?
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[ It might be too small, in truth. But what is that other than an excuse to pull Alucard tighter to him, to be as small as possible? He starts up the stairs, pausing every few steps to press tiny kisses to Alucard's face. ]
You'll be there, so it'll be perfect.
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He wants more though. Leans into every kiss.]
I hope so. I want that.
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It probably is going to be something of a squeeze to get the both of them in there. Worth the effort, though. Well worth it. ]
I think I like when you say what you want. [ He doesn't do that much, and Trevor gets the feeling that he barely does it at all around anyone else. So much of the conversation around their- whatever it is - has been focused on what he can manage. What feels safe. What he wants has fallen to the side somewhat. And outside of that? Just about everything has been for some patient or another. ] You ought to do it more often.
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Trevor's hands through his hair get a smile, and Alucard gently attaches to his wrist.]
I don't have to. If I want to do something, I do it.
[It is different when there's another person though. So different, and he's just starting to understand that.]
Pass me my nightshirt? It's on the stand to your left.
[If Trevor's going to be here, then Alucard's changing now.]
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[ There's a certain irony, isn't there, to him asking Alucard to be more selfish because he likes it? He doesn't muse on it too much, because he doesn't really feel like musing on anything right now. It would take his attention away from the present for too many precious seconds.
He hands the nightshirt over, suddenly left with a concern that he hasn't needed to think about while he's been sleeping as a swarm of moths. ]
Should I- wear anything? Are human clothes good for sleeping in? I've not been sleeping in this shape since I arrived.
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[Alucard is quick to change. His shirt comes off, the night shirt goes on. Then he fusses with trousers, and it takes barely a minute. He's perhaps a little egged on at the prospect of just curling up close against Trevor.]
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He does watch Alucard change, though. He wasn't wearing anything at all not long ago, so it doesn't seem too untoward. His gaze is soft, happy. ]
You got so beautiful, here.
[ He was beautiful before, of course. At least once he wasn't so starved and scared and hurt. But seven years of not being starved and scared and hurt has done wonders. ]
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[He does smile when he speaks though, meaning all of it is in good jest. But more than that, he just remains on the very edge of the bed, waiting for Trevor to settle in. Trevor is bigger - wider - than he is. Easier for him to find a spot and then Alucard to take up all the remaining space.]
I was right to try and get to this city. But I don't think I would have survived it without your intervention first.
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Would you prefer handsome? Lovely? Clever and kind and- [ His hands brush over Alucard's nightshirt and he grips at the coth of it for a moment, smiling. ] -there aren't words. Not in any language I've ever spoken.
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When there's no language left, there's only action.
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It's everything he imagined.
He stretches one arm over Alucard, pulling him in closer. The fingers of the other hand lie between the pillow and Alucard's cheek, stroking softly. He smiles, letting his legs brush against Alucard's. ]
I don't know that there'll ever be actions, either. Not enough. [ But he leans forward to kiss Alucard. ] I'll do what I can.
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[The kiss that follows is everything Alucard can't say. Thank you for pulling me away from myself. Thank you for insisting I heal. Thank you for placing me where I needed to be. He holds Trevor close and closes his eyes, losing more and more in the kiss. You're here and I want you to stay. You're here and I'm scared of being this happy but I want it all the same.
Alucard doesn't know how long the kiss goes on for. All he knows is that he's poured all of himself into it.]
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I love you. [ He says it so easily when he finally pulls away, faces so close that Alucard's eyes take up the entirety of his vision. ]
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