ALWAYS SUNNY FONT: the gang goes to france

[cryptsleeper]

Comments

[cryptsleeper]

Enough to be reasonably confident that you aren't going to do something stupid and move the bone.

[Which is pretty much a quick and witty way to distract Trevor from the fact that the resetting is going to start now and that it isn't going to be like sewing that damn side wound up. Alucard gets bones, he's felt his own heal time and again. So this is easier.]

[miraclewhip]

Won't move the bone, maybe.

[ Having someone else reset the bone is much like having someone else sew the wound in a lot of ways. There's none of that fucking hesitation, none of having to push yourself to do something that fucking hurts. But there's also no control, no chance to steel yourself, and that adds to the pain. He hunches over, teeth clenched, and growls out some amalgamation of several curse words that just ends up sounding like one of Sypha's fucked up magic languages. But he keeps talking, partly to keep himself distracted. ]

Not sure anything in your collection there's going to stop me from doing stupid shit unless you're planning on tying me up with the bandages.

Which would be acceptable.

[ How to cheer up your boyfriend: flirt with him in a manner that is significantly not appropriate for flirting with someone so inexperienced with this shit, while clearly in immense pain, while he's trying to focus on an important task. ]

[cryptsleeper]

Don't be clever, I'm trying to work.

[One day Trevor's going to actually figure out that Alucard's experience with relationships is comically low, and then maybe he will be less of an ass. As it is, Alucard is skilled at tuning out Trevor's commentary, and the bone is in place after just a few more moments.]

And don't move.

[For the splint there's a firmer thing made of...Alucard's not sure, but it seems stable enough, and that gets pressed over Trevor's wrist. Then the rest is bandages, applied carefully to make sure everything is held in place.]

[miraclewhip]

I'll let you know if you're ever in danger of me being clever.

[ But he does stay still, letting Alucard work. It's not pleasant at all, but it's better than it was. Feels more like a body part and less like something horrible that's stuck to his arm. He'll need to try to move his fingers, to test if he can, but he'll wait for permission first. ]

[cryptsleeper]

[There may be more bandages used than strictly required for this. He thinks this is a valid concern, because Trevor and because Alucard would rather err on the side of caution. But he is done eventually, and with that he releases Trevor's hand.]

Move your fingers carefully but nothing else.

[miraclewhip]

[ Carefully, carefully, he moves his fingers. All at once, at first, and then tests at moving them one at a time. It's painful but not difficult. ]

There. Good as ever.

[cryptsleeper]

[Alucard watches. He does so with his arms across his chest, then nods in satisfaction when Trevor's done.]

Very well. This means your work on the Hold is off the table though.

[miraclewhip]

Really? And here I thought I'd be lugging timber around one handed just fine. [ He sighs. ] I'll find some way to amuse myself. No doubt Sypha will be talking both our ears off for the next week once she's back anyway.

[ But hey, his arm's as wrapped up as it's going to be. He turns it over, experimenting some more. ]

You can tell her I fucked up and hit it with a hammer, if you like.

[cryptsleeper]

A hammer wouldn't leave a clean break. And, as you have noted in the past, I am terrible at lying.

[They're going to have to tell her the truth. The stupid, embarrassing truth.]

Unless you want to try that lie, buy us a day, then have her figure it out.

[miraclewhip]

May as well. I'll be the one she blames for it, you know. 'Belmont, were you taunting him again?'

[ He laughs. ]

Which I was, but still unfair.

[cryptsleeper]

Oh is that what you two discuss on the road?

[This is...easier. It puts off guilt, stupid back and forth like this.]

[miraclewhip]

Half of what we discuss on the road, I'm afraid, is too sordid for your delicate ears.

[ Bully the vampire. ]

But yes, the other half is her speculating about who I'm going to be starting fights with and scolding me for it preemptively.

[cryptsleeper]

And yet, in spite of scolding, you do it anyway and get yourself in deeper trouble because you were told not to do it.

[He shakes his head. Trevor Belmont you are too easy to predict.]

You really ought to listen to her on those things, just to throw her off slightly.

[New game: bully the Speaker.]

[miraclewhip]

Well if I've already been scolded for it, there's no sense in not going ahead and doing it.

[ He grins. He likes this speaker bullying game. Though it's not going to keep him from ALSO bullying the vampire. ]

Well, it's a little late for that on this occasion. We could lean into it, let her think that we really did fight. Then we let her figure it out on her own.

[cryptsleeper]

But you do it so often. So for you to actually pretend to be scolded, now that would throw her off. I thought you were a tactician.

[NO. BULLY THE SPEAKER ONLY!]

I do like this idea. Blame reconstruction on the Hold as the source, since that's...true enough.

[miraclewhip]

Are you suggesting I just spend a day behaving myself and see what she does?

[ This isn't going to inspire any future actions no not at all. ]

For a very generous definition of 'true'. You're getting better at this.