[ So far, so good. Alucard isn't laughing at him, or calling him perverted or- anything he was worried about, really. He strokes once, twice, slowly, coaxing himself to hardness. ]
Just- watch what I do. And if you copy it, and you're watching me- then you can act like it's your dick here. Like I'm touching you, but without the me touching you part.
[ It seems like a good idea in his head, at least. ]
[He thinks he can do that, at least. Alucard's never heard this particular tone in his own voice, and it's so, so heady that it takes a moment to realize it's his own.
Alucard's hand does wrap around himself. There's a soft hiss, adjusting to even that much pressure.]
[ The remaining worry about being judged fades from him, at that. His shoulders sink and he smiles, more relaxed now. ]
Whenever you're ready for it, I'll be here.
[ When he moves his hand, it's slow. He knows that even this much is going to be a lot for Alucard. And- honestly if he does the same thing, and pretends that it's his dick in Alucard's hand, it's a lot for him as well. ]
[Alucard would be baffled about a fear of judgement. Who could judge anyone in a moment like this?
He wants to ask more questions. Like if they're going to tell Sypha.
But he doesn't. He mirrors how Trevor moves his hand, and almost immediately there's a soft noise from him. It's delighted and pleased and it doesn't even hint at being overwhelmed - at least, not yet.]
[ They are, sooner rather than later. She needs to know that this works, even if he's pretty convinced that if she finds out that he tied himself up unprompted then she'll start laughing and never stop.
That noise of delight, though. It's wonderful. Something he thought he'd never hear, something he's been wanting to hear for so long now. ]
Fuck. Fuck, your hands are so soft.
[ It's not Alucard's hand, of course. But he can pretend. Act like they're doing this for each other, even if that isn't possible yet. And even pretending makes this different, so much better, than it would be otherwise. ] You're so lovely. So lovely.
[Alucard doesn't know if they'll be able to do this sooner rather than later. He wants to, he wants to just leap across the bed and take Trevor in hand, but it's important not to rush. He knows, and he loves Trevor for the caution in this.
But also fuck if those words don't hit him right in the core, and his hand speeds up by accident.]
That tongue is too smooth. You've been taking lessons from Sypha.
[He probably has. Probably learned all the right words for this moment from her too.]
Perhaps. [ Absolutely. ] Maybe I've just had a lot of time to think about what to say. [ Also true. He's been thinking about this for so, so long.
He brings his eyes up to Alucard's for a moment, grinning as he increases his pace to match his. ]
Maybe eventually you'll be able to find out just how smooth it is. [ He pairs that statement with a long, slower stroke, because it absolutely needed clarifying what he was referring to. ]
[Alucard lets out a soft sigh at that. It's the words mixed with that slow motion that makes the noise happen, and then Alucard's hand tries to slow down too.
[ He's used by now to being the one to ask those sorts of questions, to give warning and ask permission for contact. It's nice to have that turned around. Shit, it's only a kiss they're talking about and he's still gripping himself a little tighter with anticipation. Is this what it's like for Alucard every time they ask permission to touch him? ]
Of course.
[ He looks down again, at Alucard's hand and his not-entirely-controlled movements, and tries to match the pace to keep the illusion of touching each other going a little longer. ]
Thought so [ He chuckles to himself a little, but it’s not like he has any room to talk. Usually he’d last at least a little longer, but this is more than usual. He hisses in air as he tries to match Alucard’s almost desperate pace. ]
Fuck. You’re so pretty like this. You- [ He is. Beautiful. Trevor looks like he’s about to say something else but then he draws his lower lip between his teeth, breath coming out as a long whine. ]
[It's a question, or at least Alucard tries to make it sound like a question. The sudden breath was a concern, but no. Alucard understands what's going on, and from him there's no whine. There's just a sharp breath and a loud groan, and--
---he's just warm. All over. Warm and boneless and breathless and he might be using his other hand to just remain upright.]
[ Remaining upright is highly overrated. Trevor sinks onto his side, letting the soft mattress and blankets devour him. ]
Adrian.
[ It's soft and contented, and it's a few long breaths before he has the energy to raise one arm, silently inviting Alucard to join him. But it is an invitation and not a demand. Alucard's managed so much today, he's not going to be upset if he can't manage the cuddling part. ]
[Alucard does flop over towards Trevor. He's overwhelmed. He might yet withdraw. But he still wants that kiss and after all of that, it feels wrong not to go close to Trevor in any way.
He doesn't press up close against Trevor. He's an small distance away, just enough to kiss Trevor again.
It's a soft and unsure one. Alucard isn't sure of his own feelings right now, never mind Trevor's.]
[ He wants more. No matter how much he tries to be unselfish, tries to think about how hard Alucard must be trying in order to get this far, he still can't stop himself from wanting more. He wants to pull Alucard close, until he can feel his heart beat against his own chest. Wants to bury his face in his hair and pepper every part of him he can reach in kisses.
But he barely even kisses back, just lets his lips press against Alucard's. When it ends he reaches up, twisting a lock of Alucard's hair around a finger, then brings it to his lips and kisses that instead ]
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Just- watch what I do. And if you copy it, and you're watching me- then you can act like it's your dick here. Like I'm touching you, but without the me touching you part.
[ It seems like a good idea in his head, at least. ]
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[He thinks he can do that, at least. Alucard's never heard this particular tone in his own voice, and it's so, so heady that it takes a moment to realize it's his own.
Alucard's hand does wrap around himself. There's a soft hiss, adjusting to even that much pressure.]
I'll...one day I want this from you.
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Whenever you're ready for it, I'll be here.
[ When he moves his hand, it's slow. He knows that even this much is going to be a lot for Alucard. And- honestly if he does the same thing, and pretends that it's his dick in Alucard's hand, it's a lot for him as well. ]
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He wants to ask more questions. Like if they're going to tell Sypha.
But he doesn't. He mirrors how Trevor moves his hand, and almost immediately there's a soft noise from him. It's delighted and pleased and it doesn't even hint at being overwhelmed - at least, not yet.]
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That noise of delight, though. It's wonderful. Something he thought he'd never hear, something he's been wanting to hear for so long now. ]
Fuck. Fuck, your hands are so soft.
[ It's not Alucard's hand, of course. But he can pretend. Act like they're doing this for each other, even if that isn't possible yet. And even pretending makes this different, so much better, than it would be otherwise. ] You're so lovely. So lovely.
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But also fuck if those words don't hit him right in the core, and his hand speeds up by accident.]
That tongue is too smooth. You've been taking lessons from Sypha.
[He probably has. Probably learned all the right words for this moment from her too.]
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He brings his eyes up to Alucard's for a moment, grinning as he increases his pace to match his. ]
Maybe eventually you'll be able to find out just how smooth it is. [ He pairs that statement with a long, slower stroke, because it absolutely needed clarifying what he was referring to. ]
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It doesn't work at all. His hand's still fast.]
I'd like that.
[Fuck. He's never felt this warm before.]
Can...can we kiss after we're done? Please?
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Of course.
[ He looks down again, at Alucard's hand and his not-entirely-controlled movements, and tries to match the pace to keep the illusion of touching each other going a little longer. ]
You getting close?
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Yes. Very.
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Fuck. You’re so pretty like this. You- [ He is. Beautiful. Trevor looks like he’s about to say something else but then he draws his lower lip between his teeth, breath coming out as a long whine. ]
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[It's a question, or at least Alucard tries to make it sound like a question. The sudden breath was a concern, but no. Alucard understands what's going on, and from him there's no whine. There's just a sharp breath and a loud groan, and--
---he's just warm. All over. Warm and boneless and breathless and he might be using his other hand to just remain upright.]
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Adrian.
[ It's soft and contented, and it's a few long breaths before he has the energy to raise one arm, silently inviting Alucard to join him. But it is an invitation and not a demand. Alucard's managed so much today, he's not going to be upset if he can't manage the cuddling part. ]
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He doesn't press up close against Trevor. He's an small distance away, just enough to kiss Trevor again.
It's a soft and unsure one. Alucard isn't sure of his own feelings right now, never mind Trevor's.]
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But he barely even kisses back, just lets his lips press against Alucard's. When it ends he reaches up, twisting a lock of Alucard's hair around a finger, then brings it to his lips and kisses that instead ]
You did fucking brilliant.
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[He knows there must be so much restraint on Trevor's end. It's beautiful, how he knows to reign himself in. How good he is to Alucard's needs.]
You do so much for me.
[I love you for that.]
I don't know if I express my gratitude enough but...it's there. It always will be. You're so important.