cryptsleeper | Catch All

[There's a wordless nod. The blanket falls to the floor with a little fwoomp. That's all.]

That's- I can do that. Just give me a little while.

[ He picks up the blanket, arranging it around Alucard as best he can without it actually touching him. ]

Stay here. Or make yourself easy to find, if you go somewhere else.

Mmm.

[He can stay. He can do not moving.

He can even tug the blanket around himself a little more, the weight of it comforting if nothing else.]

[ He's gone a while. And he smells different when he returns, hands cupped around something. A little like wood smoke but off somehow, more fragrant.

He brings his hands close to Alucard, still clasped around something. ]

I need you to breathe in, when I open my hands.

[He notices the smell first. It's strong. Distinct. It drifts into the room and something in him relaxes.

Relaxes?

He tenses at that.

Then relaxes.

The feelings flip flop the closer and closer Trevor gets, until he's in the room. Alucard can feel every part of him tighten.]

What is it?

[There's still terror there, but muted now.

One of the pomanders. You filed the recipies under non-human medicine and tools for allied vampires. The kind for new fledglings.

[ Which is to say that it's close to as strong as it can get without risking being permanent, made to numb the pain of the transformation and to suppress all emotions rather than simply preventing aggression. The strain and agony of transformation and the initial hunger make new fledglings dangerous to deal with non-violently but also wreaks hell on them mentally. It's best, at least according to Belmont wisdom, to suppress all of that initially and lower the dose later. The easiest way to allow those turned against their will to continue to live.

He opens his hands. ]

Breathe in.

[His brain catches up. Slowly. Carefully. It knows what the stuff is, the uses, why it's so good for newly turned vampires but--

--it's a weapon in the right hands, and he knows, he knows he can't trust anyone. Especially not an entire family of vampire hunters.]

I can't. You'll just hurt me it'll be the same thing--

[He backs away. Or tries to. The effects of the smoke prevent that much, because that? That involves aggression.

[ Well shit. On the one hand, it's a good thing he used such a strong dose. On the other? Alucard was never scared of him when he was actually trying to kill him. This is- disturbing. ]

I'm not going to hurt you.

[ He reaches out, holding the pomander's iron chain in both hands. This part is, he knows, probably going to be the worst. There's no way that hands reaching for his neck is a good thing right now. But if he can just get the pomander around Alucard's neck, he can tend to the rest of those burns. He can try to have a normal conversation.

He'll apologise later. ]

I'm sorry. It'll be easier soon.

[He can back away. He can do that much, wide eyed and knowing something is wrong.

Don't.

[A single word, drenched in terror. Wanting to get away. Needing to.]

[ He can't bring himself to do it. Even though it's the correct thing to do. Even though it'll help. His hands tremble near Alucard's neck for a second, then withdraw. ]

Reach your hands out.

[ He holds the pomander by its chain. ]

I'll trust you to hold it instead of putting it around your neck. But only if you promise to trust me not to hurt you.

Get rid of it.

[He can demand something. That's progress, even if his voice nearly cracks.]

I'll sit and let you finish just get rid of it.

[ He opens his mouth to argue, then just nods and leaves the room. When he returns it's without the pomander. He doesn't approach Alucard immediately, instead tossing the Morning Star to the ground. Then the Vampire killer. Then a collection of knives and wooden and metal stakes from various places on his person. ]

Nothing left that can touch you. Can I come over there?

[He watches Trevor disarm. All of it. Every last inch, and Alucard stares because he's never seen it happen.

He's safe. As safe as he can be with a vampire hunter, but he still wants to hesitate. Pain argues though, and so--]

Yes.

[ Fuck, but it feels weird to not be carrying a single weapon.

He moves to Alucard like he's hoping to die of old age before he has to deal with this. One slow, slow step at a time. But he reaches him eventually nonetheless, kneeling down at his side. ]

You could kill me like this. I wouldn't be able to do a thing to stop you. I'm trusting you.

[ He says it very slowly, because he's- maybe a little nervous about this. The pomander was for his safety as well as to help Alucard. If he starts thrashing around when he medicine stings, there's a good chance he could do real damage. ]

Try not to make me regret it too much, hmm?

Don't joke.

[He knows it isn't a joke, but still. They've seen the bodies. They must have seen the bodies by now. They must know about what happened and how this just makes everything worse.

But he's good. He stays still.]

Just do what must be done.

It's not- [ He huffs. ] -never fucking mind.

[ He picks up a scrap of gauze and soaks it, and he has to swallow and brace himself to still the shaking in his hands before he can smooth the cloth over the burns. There's not instant relief, save for the coolness of the damp cloth. There's still an hour's more damage burned into the skin than there is in the places that were treated before. But it won't get worse. ]

We're not here because we want to hurt you. You know that. You have to know that.

They said that too--

[And that? That finally has Alucard's head drop down in shame. He stays still. But now it's too still, more statue than person.]

And they were lying, and I’m not.

[ Still is, at the very least, still better than thrashing about. He applies a little more of the medicine, smoothing damp cloth over Alucard’s hip. It’s easier, now he’s staying still. Less nerve-wracking. He knows that Alucard wouldn’t knowingly hurt him, but pain is a difficult thing and he’s powerful, even injured. An involuntary movement with too much force behind it and this situation gets a lot worse. ]

I’m doing my best. This can’t remain undone, and I don’t know what else to do to prove that I’m trying to help.

I can't know that.

[There. He's said it all. That he's reeled so hard that not even the other two have his trust right now. That he's going to be like this now, although the question of how long is an open ended mystery.

Alucard can at least let Trevor work in a horrible silence. He doesn't move, but that isn't trust. That's a scared element not being able to fight or flight - just freezing up, horrible and scared and so, so unsure.

He doesn't ask when Trevor's done. He doesn't demand Trevor hurry. He just remains where he is.]

[ Oh.

It's hard not to be a little hurt. A little frustrated. He knows it's not Alucard's fault, that it's nothing to do with them and everything to do with the two corpses in that one horrible room. But it's hard to know that there were two people in the world willing to tolerate him and now there's one and for that not to ache.

He finishes in silence. It's only when the last of the bandages is applied, the parts applied earliest already dried into a second skin, that he speaks again. ]

The incense is burning two rooms down. The door's closed to keep the smoke in but if you need to not think, you can go in there. Sypha and I won't go into that room unless we're invited.

[ He rearranges the blanket. Carefully, trying not to brush the fabric of it over the burns. Brings it up around Alucard's shoulders to wrap it around him. ]

If you don't want us here, we'll leave at dawn tomorrow.

And I can't know that I won't hurt you both.

[Out of fear. Even with the incense, which terrifies Alucard. It rends him unable to be aggressive, and his defense is often so very aggressive.

He shakes when Trevor's done. A nervous dog, unsure. Horrified. Unable to account for what will happen next. Clings to the blanket when it's placed over his shoulders, like it's the most precious armor.

A choked noise comes out. It's followed by:]

I don't know. I can't know.

Yeah.

[ He might hurt them. It's- unavoidable. Because it's human to lash out, to be irrational, but Alucard's strength isn't human. Sypha can defend herself even when not carrying weapons. He? Really can't.

But Alucard reacts well (or reacts, at least) to the blanket, and so he pulls it tighter so it covers him entirely. ]

I'm going to build a pyre. So she can burn the bodies when she wakes up. [ A pause, because it shouldn't have to be fire and yet. ] I don't want to bury them, not if it would keep them here.

As you like.

[He shouldn't make the other two clean up the bodies. It's his responsibility. His mistake. They can't....they shouldn't....]

I'm sorry.

[ He's been around Sypha too long.

He knows this because his arms are around Alucard after wrapping the blanket around him and instead of withdrawing them, he pulls them closed. Which is stupid, because they've just talked about how easily Alucard could hurt them by mistake. ]

Whatever the fuck happened, they'll be gone once she wakes up.

[He goes too still. His breath is shallow. ]

They're still here.

[In his head, at least.]

Going to always be here.

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