cryptsleeper | Catch All

[Alucard goes. He takes the things and goes but he doesn't say where and he doesn't stop moving until he's in a completely different wing of the castle. High up, because at least that keeps him moving until there's no where else to move to.

He tries to do as Trevor instructed, part of him registering that yes, this helps with the pain. That he's in physical pain as much as psychological pain, and at least one of these things can be fixed. But his hands shake. Moments of horror replay in his head when he looks at the burns. His hands shake and then--

--he can't. He can't and so he just sits there, more sobs escaping his throat. The sound carries without his realizing it, and then dawn comes.

Alucard doesn't even register when Trevor finds him. He's managed 2 whole additional bandages and that's it.]

[ He- probably shouldn't have let him go.

He knows that, and it's becoming still more clear as he looks through every. Fucking. Room. In the fucking castle. He's bolted. He's bolted and he knew that he would because that's what things DO when they're spooked. But what was he supposed to do? Hold him still and force the bandages on to him? Get between him and the door and order him back into the bed?

Maybe he has put everything together a little, despite his best attempts. ]

...lost track of time, huh?

[ He follows the sound of sobs, in the end. Up stairs. And stairs. And stairs. With his human legs and his human lungs. Ugh. He's panting a little when he enters the room, a thick blanket tucked under one arm. He sighs, putting the blanket down. ]

The longer it takes, the longer the oil'll have to do damage. If you can't do it, let me. You'll hate it less in the long run. Promise.

[He should have heard those footsteps. Why didn't he hear those footsteps? Trevor's breathing? Any of it?

Why isn't he even startled when Trevor walks in?

Alucard doesn't know. All he understands is that there's something awful inside him that isn't letting him react normally. Because all he manages right now is to tug what he already had on himself as far as sheets went a little closer. Like it's armor. Like it's going to protect him from anything.

Two hoarse words squeak out.]

I can't.

...you can't what?

[ He's not entirely certain that there's an answer to that, but he has to try. ]

Can you apply the medicine?

Just.

[There's no more words. There's nothing. There's no Alucard right now.]

I can't.

Oh.

[ He drags the blanket over, pushing it into Alucard's arms. ]

Would it be easier to just- not feel. For a while?

[There's a wordless nod. The blanket falls to the floor with a little fwoomp. That's all.]

That's- I can do that. Just give me a little while.

[ He picks up the blanket, arranging it around Alucard as best he can without it actually touching him. ]

Stay here. Or make yourself easy to find, if you go somewhere else.

Mmm.

[He can stay. He can do not moving.

He can even tug the blanket around himself a little more, the weight of it comforting if nothing else.]

[ He's gone a while. And he smells different when he returns, hands cupped around something. A little like wood smoke but off somehow, more fragrant.

He brings his hands close to Alucard, still clasped around something. ]

I need you to breathe in, when I open my hands.

[He notices the smell first. It's strong. Distinct. It drifts into the room and something in him relaxes.

Relaxes?

He tenses at that.

Then relaxes.

The feelings flip flop the closer and closer Trevor gets, until he's in the room. Alucard can feel every part of him tighten.]

What is it?

[There's still terror there, but muted now.

One of the pomanders. You filed the recipies under non-human medicine and tools for allied vampires. The kind for new fledglings.

[ Which is to say that it's close to as strong as it can get without risking being permanent, made to numb the pain of the transformation and to suppress all emotions rather than simply preventing aggression. The strain and agony of transformation and the initial hunger make new fledglings dangerous to deal with non-violently but also wreaks hell on them mentally. It's best, at least according to Belmont wisdom, to suppress all of that initially and lower the dose later. The easiest way to allow those turned against their will to continue to live.

He opens his hands. ]

Breathe in.

[His brain catches up. Slowly. Carefully. It knows what the stuff is, the uses, why it's so good for newly turned vampires but--

--it's a weapon in the right hands, and he knows, he knows he can't trust anyone. Especially not an entire family of vampire hunters.]

I can't. You'll just hurt me it'll be the same thing--

[He backs away. Or tries to. The effects of the smoke prevent that much, because that? That involves aggression.

[ Well shit. On the one hand, it's a good thing he used such a strong dose. On the other? Alucard was never scared of him when he was actually trying to kill him. This is- disturbing. ]

I'm not going to hurt you.

[ He reaches out, holding the pomander's iron chain in both hands. This part is, he knows, probably going to be the worst. There's no way that hands reaching for his neck is a good thing right now. But if he can just get the pomander around Alucard's neck, he can tend to the rest of those burns. He can try to have a normal conversation.

He'll apologise later. ]

I'm sorry. It'll be easier soon.

[He can back away. He can do that much, wide eyed and knowing something is wrong.

Don't.

[A single word, drenched in terror. Wanting to get away. Needing to.]

[ He can't bring himself to do it. Even though it's the correct thing to do. Even though it'll help. His hands tremble near Alucard's neck for a second, then withdraw. ]

Reach your hands out.

[ He holds the pomander by its chain. ]

I'll trust you to hold it instead of putting it around your neck. But only if you promise to trust me not to hurt you.

Get rid of it.

[He can demand something. That's progress, even if his voice nearly cracks.]

I'll sit and let you finish just get rid of it.

[ He opens his mouth to argue, then just nods and leaves the room. When he returns it's without the pomander. He doesn't approach Alucard immediately, instead tossing the Morning Star to the ground. Then the Vampire killer. Then a collection of knives and wooden and metal stakes from various places on his person. ]

Nothing left that can touch you. Can I come over there?

[He watches Trevor disarm. All of it. Every last inch, and Alucard stares because he's never seen it happen.

He's safe. As safe as he can be with a vampire hunter, but he still wants to hesitate. Pain argues though, and so--]

Yes.

[ Fuck, but it feels weird to not be carrying a single weapon.

He moves to Alucard like he's hoping to die of old age before he has to deal with this. One slow, slow step at a time. But he reaches him eventually nonetheless, kneeling down at his side. ]

You could kill me like this. I wouldn't be able to do a thing to stop you. I'm trusting you.

[ He says it very slowly, because he's- maybe a little nervous about this. The pomander was for his safety as well as to help Alucard. If he starts thrashing around when he medicine stings, there's a good chance he could do real damage. ]

Try not to make me regret it too much, hmm?

Don't joke.

[He knows it isn't a joke, but still. They've seen the bodies. They must have seen the bodies by now. They must know about what happened and how this just makes everything worse.

But he's good. He stays still.]

Just do what must be done.

It's not- [ He huffs. ] -never fucking mind.

[ He picks up a scrap of gauze and soaks it, and he has to swallow and brace himself to still the shaking in his hands before he can smooth the cloth over the burns. There's not instant relief, save for the coolness of the damp cloth. There's still an hour's more damage burned into the skin than there is in the places that were treated before. But it won't get worse. ]

We're not here because we want to hurt you. You know that. You have to know that.

They said that too--

[And that? That finally has Alucard's head drop down in shame. He stays still. But now it's too still, more statue than person.]

And they were lying, and I’m not.

[ Still is, at the very least, still better than thrashing about. He applies a little more of the medicine, smoothing damp cloth over Alucard’s hip. It’s easier, now he’s staying still. Less nerve-wracking. He knows that Alucard wouldn’t knowingly hurt him, but pain is a difficult thing and he’s powerful, even injured. An involuntary movement with too much force behind it and this situation gets a lot worse. ]

I’m doing my best. This can’t remain undone, and I don’t know what else to do to prove that I’m trying to help.

I can't know that.

[There. He's said it all. That he's reeled so hard that not even the other two have his trust right now. That he's going to be like this now, although the question of how long is an open ended mystery.

Alucard can at least let Trevor work in a horrible silence. He doesn't move, but that isn't trust. That's a scared element not being able to fight or flight - just freezing up, horrible and scared and so, so unsure.

He doesn't ask when Trevor's done. He doesn't demand Trevor hurry. He just remains where he is.]

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